you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I don't deserve a penis
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize