This girl is more easily done than said...
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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