Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize