Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My penis needs a shock collar
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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