Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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