Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Boobs speak an international language.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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