new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
it glows. i had to have it.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
