He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
