apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
