Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
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