It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
