I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
