If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
