Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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