pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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