Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
