Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize