Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I'm drive I can fine osifer
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
are you so shy because you have an std?
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize