I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
