Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
