now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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