Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
