hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize