I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
