Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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