Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
