Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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