And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
one might say we're banned from that church
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
