Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
