I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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