So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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