i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Randomize
