sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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