Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
