I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
