idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
