I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
