So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
the day after is always just damage control
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
