Fine. I'll sleep in my office
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
