school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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