I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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