She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
