susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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