Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
