Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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