I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
