"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
