Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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