I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
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