Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Found the puke drawer
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize