Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
